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    Guard Class Focuses on Building Healthy Relationships



    Courtesy Story

    North Dakota National Guard Public Affairs

    BISMARCK, N.D. - The North Dakota National Guard Office of the Chaplain hosted a relationship enrichment class titled Premarital Interpersonal Choices and Knowledge at the Ramkota Hotel, Bismarck, N.D., Feb. 26-27. PICK is an annual event initiated in 2008 to promote healthy relationships for single soldiers within the organization.

    "The fun name for the training is 'How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk'," said Air National Guard Staff Sgt. Nathan Sather, who works with the Office of the Chaplain at the 119th Air National Guard Wing in Fargo. Sather defined being a jerk as "someone who is persistently resistant to change."

    P.I.C.K. training is broken down into two main areas. First is the Relationship Attachment Model, which contains five bonding dynamics to use in relationships. The RAM rates each dynamic according to how often a person should depend on and use it in a relationship. In order, the dynamics include knowing, trusting, relying, committing and touching your partner.

    "If a relationship involves a higher dependence on touching and less of a dependence on trusting your partner, your relationship has become unhealthy," Sather said, citing an example of how the process works.

    The second area of P.I.C.K. training involves using the FACES method, a process in which participants use the 'know' dynamic of the RAM. FACES stands for family background, attitudes and actions, compatibility, examples of other relationships and skills of communication. Studying these components of getting to know a partner before moving on to trusting the partner helps ensure a successful relationship.

    "The purpose of PICK is to allow individual insight into relationships.
    People learn a lot about themselves and how they act while building awareness of who they are and how their relationships function," said Bernadette Ternes, a civilian employee who works with the North Dakota National Guard's Joint Force Headquarters in Bismarck.

    "This isn't about finding the perfect person, because none of us are perfect.

    The point is to encourage us to identify our weaknesses and flaws so we can change ourselves for the better," Sather said.

    Two more enrichment classes will be held during 2011, which include Seven Habits of Effective Families held June 24-26 and Marriage Relationship Enrichment held Sept. 9-11 in Medora, N.D. These events are part of the Strong Bonds program, which works to strengthen military families and increase readiness through relationship training and skill-building. Strong Bonds offers a number of programs service members can attend, depending on
    their relationship status.



    Date Taken: 02.27.2011
    Date Posted: 03.01.2011 09:37
    Story ID: 66284

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