Photo By Amy Perry | Dr. Angelia Riggsbee, founder of Healing After Domestic Violence, shared her...... read more read more
FORT LEE, Va. - Dr. Angelia Riggsbee, founder of Healing After Domestic Violence, shared her terrifying story of overcoming spousal abuse during of the 2015 Community Action Alliance Domestic Violence Awareness Month luncheon at the Regimental Club Friday.
“My story started about 20 years ago when I met a young man who was tall, dark and handsome,” she began. “He came from a good home, and his father was a pastor. I didn’t think I could do any better.”
The two started to date, fell in love and Riggsbee thought she had it made. He had a job, an apartment and his own car – everything she was looking for.
“We went out one night with some friends, and all of a sudden, his mood changed really quickly,” she said. “He wanted me to go with him into the bathroom. I wondered what was going on. The bathroom was very small, and I was up against the sink. All of a sudden, BAM, he slapped me. My face hit the mirror and the mirror cracked. Glass shattered everywhere. That was the start of worse things to come.”
Riggsbee said she stood there – shocked at the events – and didn’t understand what was happening, especially since she didn’t grow up in a home with domestic violence.
“I left and went home,” she said. “My initial thoughts were ‘I’m done.’ We weren’t married, we were only dating, so I was done. The honeymoon stage started. I got the flowers, I got the candy, I got the cries and I got the telephone calls – ‘Please take me back. It will never happen again. I love you. I was drinking that night. It will never happen again.’
“Like some ladies do, when we love, we love hard,” Riggsbee continued. “Even when something happens like that, we think it won’t happen again. So, I went back and we continued to date. We ended up getting married.”
Everything was fine, Riggsbee said, until one night she was late returning from a family reunion. She came home with her cousin and her cousin’s baby, and as soon as she pulled into the driveway, the front door was flung open, and her husband came to the car and ordered her upstairs.
“We go up into the bedroom, and he slams me into the wall, pushes me into a corner and begins to beat my head into the wall while fussing and arguing with me,” she said. “I was trying to figure out what was going on. I just wanted to get out of the corner.”
Riggsbee spotted a knife she kept by the bed in case of intruders – her husband worked the late shift – so she picked it up and told him she wanted out of the corner. He moved back and when she went forward, he went to advance on her again. She brought the knife back and ended up slicing her hand and fingers significantly.
“I look down and see my hand sliced wide open – I’m looking at arteries, tendons, blood going everywhere,” she said. “Everyone downstairs ran up to find out what happened, and by this point, I’m beginning to black out from the blood loss. They called 911. I regain consciousness in the ambulance and I look over at my husband to hear him say ‘I’m sorry. Please don’t tell.’”
Riggsbee said she covered for him, but nearly lost her fingers in the incident.
“I go through the rehabilitation, and I get out of the hospital,” she said. “You think I would leave at that point. ‘Just leave’ … isn’t that what we tell victims? ‘Just leave.’ I didn’t leave. I loved my husband. He begged, he pleaded and he cried. I stayed.”
Another incident happened when she was six months pregnant. Her husband choked her until she blacked out.
“I started thinking then this wasn’t the life I intended for myself,” Riggsbee said. “But still, I didn’t leave. I didn’t want to bring my baby into a broken home. I still wanted to work things out and hoped things would change.”
Three months after their baby was born, they had an argument and her husband slapped her to the floor.
“I ended up on the floor beside my baby’s carriage. I looked up at her and said ‘This is it. Enough is enough,’” she recalled. “I called my parents and told them what was going on, and they came and picked me up. I finally left.”
Even after she left, her ex-husband continued the violence. One day, when she was talking to a male friend, her ex pulled up next to her and called her over to him. He wanted to know why she was talking to the man and got upset when she told him to mind his own business.
“As I walked away from his car, he hit the gas and hit me,” she said. “I hit the hood of his car, hit the windshield and ended up on the pavement.”
Riggsbee said she was nearly paralyzed from the incident. During her stay at the hospital, she decided that if she made it through the ordeal, she would spend her life helping victims of domestic violence.
Now, her program – Healing After Domestic Violence – provides training and workshops, support groups, counseling and much more for victims of domestic violence. At the end of her presentation, Riggsbee encourages the Fort Lee community to stand together against domestic violence.
“Fort Lee, your motto is ‘Defend and Support,’” she said. “I need you to defend and support, in every way possible, to put an end to domestic violence.”
| Date Taken: | 10.22.2015 |
| Date Posted: | 10.22.2015 08:19 |
| Story ID: | 179576 |
| Location: | FORT LEE, VIRGINIA, US |
| Web Views: | 132 |
| Downloads: | 0 |
This work, Domestic violence survivor shares story at Fort Lee, by Amy Perry, identified by DVIDS, must comply with the restrictions shown on https://www.dvidshub.net/about/copyright.
No keywords found.
